sometimes the urge is too strong and giving in seems like the easiest most comfortable option. your mind goes blank and the people you care about seem very small and distant, shrinking further, disappearing. there is no right and wrong no conscience no morals. the line between reality and dreams glitches, blurry. just one step away. all of it. it seems the easiest. last heartbeats, breaths last thought. right in your palms in your fist. it feels within your control. one thing fate can’t dictate is what you decide to do with yourself. do i really want to stop. ive stopped feeling already. do i want to stop the rush. i can make myself suffer. its in my own hands. i can chose to. i dont want to stop.